Ever had the feeling that all the negative forces in the world are conspiring against you? I am near to believing that, what with all the things I have gone through and still am going through for the past three weeks to the present.
I had a hard time contacting the person I was supposed to interview for an article. I had to go through several people just to reach her. I already wished that hands could fit in telephone lines so I could have strangled an uncooperative secretary at the other end who made me call back five times in one day without connecting me to her boss. I had to wait for so many days for any of my long distance calls/emails/fax just to get answers. I used up two phone cards just to make all those calls. I spent money on a trip to Manila two weeks ago to meet with my resource person only to receive a text message while I was already on the way that she caught the flu and wanted to reschedule. I finally was able to interview her last week. She was a very nice person to talk to and for that respite, I am so grateful. The power point presentation she showed me on her laptop wasn’t saved to my flash disk due to unknown errors. I wasn’t able to write everything down because she breezed through the explanations with the assurance that she’ll be sending me the file thru email. I waited for two days to no avail. My editor agreed to move my deadline three times already. I called my resource person on her mobile phone yesterday and she said her laptop’s hard disk crashed. She assured me that she’d still email me the important points I needed. I’m still in limbo as of this writing.
Of all things to happen, I just wonder why in the world did everything seem to go wrong (they almost sound sarcastically funny) with this particular assignment? What does God want me to learn from all these? I hope I don’t disappoint Him and that I come out of this with my self-confidence intact. Frankly, I feel like a stalker already aside from the feeling that I failed. I hate to sound like making excuses but the circumstances were all beyond my control. What was I supposed to do? What CAN I still do? What should I have done differently? I am already cringing in embarrassment every time I had to ask my editor for another extension because I don’t work that way. I have always prided myself on my principles of being a professional -- a writer who submits stories on time, who’s able to acquire all the information needed for an article without sacrificing deadlines and who accomplishes everything to her satisfaction knowing that she gave her all in doing the work asked of her.
*Sigh* Just shows that we can’t win every time. I’ve had bad work days, and this is one of the worst. My only hope is that my interviewee finally remembers to open her emails tonight so she can send me what I need and that I be able to finally submit my write-up to the editor by tomorrow. I wish …